The Chicago Shady Dealer

The Chicago Shady Dealer

The Only Intentional Humor Publication of the University of Chicago

Heartwarming! After This Campus Tour Guide Fell off the Roof of Logan, Her Entire Tour Group Followed Her Anyways!

by Dan Lastres

You never know when tragedy is going to strike, and when it does, it is easy to feel powerless to help those in trouble. So when Amanda Castagno, a third year working for the admissions office, lost her footing and fell off the 9th floor terrace of the Logan arts center, she was prepared for the worst. Then something amazing happened.

The gaggle of prospective undergrads and their parents that had so faithfully followed her across campus and up to the top of the Logan center were not ready to give up on her just yet. They followed her right over the edge.

“Keeping a crowd engaged over the course of a whole campus tour can be difficult,” said Carl Hembol, an admissions counselor, “but Amanda is one of the best when it comes to selling the UChicago experience. If anyone in this office can steer students and families into a trying, expensive, and precarious situation, it’s her.”

One can easily imagine Amanda’s relief. Seeing the overachievers and their suck-up parents careen off the edge right after her must have been really reassuring. They were closely followed by the more apathetic students dragged over the edge by their overbearing mothers and fathers. Even the kids who had come to check out the University of Illinois at Chicago took the plunge - truly inspirational.

“Most tour groups tend to be pretty hard to connect with,” said Castagno, “but I was blown away by their dedication to me and the campus experience I was trying to impart to them.”

Castagno and the group were rapidly transported to the nearest trauma-1 rated emergency room at Northwestern Medical center where those who hadn’t bled out en route are still being treated. Though it’s been a trying endeavor, the experience has brought them all so much closer.